Our Ten Pound Secret- Part Two
Trials through Trimesters
It felt like a calling, or an instinct.
At the very beginning, I felt this whisper to hold this pregnancy close.
To go inward with Christ, not outward with others- in my journey.
I had been so open with so much of our story, I grieved out loud after Valor died and during Reverie’s pregnancy, birth and life.
It felt like the Lord was beckoning me to his chest, to be still and quiet as he held me through this one. To lean on him, and not on my writing, or sharing, or illusion of community through the internet.
To be honest, I felt desperately lonely. So the temptation to let others in was strong. But the Lord was clearly calling me to a place of solitude to walk this out with him.
He had work to do in the hidden secret places of me.
And so, out of reluctant, unsure obedience, I listened.
I kept this pregnancy a secret to others, and even his gender, a secret to us. Just like we had done with Valor.